Postcard

Chivalry??? Dead???

I was just reading that many women don't like men to hold the door open for them. I have always, out of common courtesy and respect, held doors open for women. To be honest I'll hold the door for a guy also because it's polite.

So I guess my question to all of you C2U women is... Should I drop this practice? Do you like it or dislike it when a guy holds the door open for you?

Our Two Cents

jomano28

nikki 1 caesar 0
cue the drums
  • Posted on 02/14/2009 09:44 am

nikki

If you wanted to stare at an ass, you could just look in the mirror, caesar ;-)
  • Posted on 02/13/2009 06:28 pm

jimmyteeten

Wow! A rude comment from caesar885! Didn't expect that huh!?

Jimmy
  • Posted on 02/13/2009 11:25 am

caesar885

I hold doors open for women all the time so I can stare at their a%%es when they walk in front of me.
  • Posted on 02/12/2009 11:41 pm

LauraD

I agree that if we were all kinder to each other the world would be better! Merging in traffic, holding doors, calling to say you'll be late... all these things used to be normal, not special kindnesses!
Now, when you're talking about "women" you have to realize that each woman is as individual as the next. There are women who don’t want all the fuss, and who feel like those kind of gestures are fake.
There are other women, on the other hand, (like me!) who eat that stuff up! It makes me blush and giggle and somehow even the smallest examples surprise and delight me. I’m genuinely grateful when someone makes me feel like a lady.
So, be kind to everyone and have manners. With women, be respectful but treat them how they like to be treated. When in doubt, just ask! As in... would you like me to get your chair? If the answer is no, she'll say no!
  • Posted on 02/12/2009 10:57 pm

jomano28

Wowzaa and Jimmy said it very well, I think that I when I hold the door for somebody, or help somebody like today I saw somebody who couldn't get the car started at a red light, I waited until he finally got it started personally I would hope a person would do the same for me if the situation was reversed. Wowza, I agree that if we just take a second, and let people merge in ahead of you it doesn't take long and it can easily make a person's day a lil brighter, and ideally that person does the same and it takes on a domino type effect. I personally when I do things like this, the only response necessary is a simple "thanks" or if you are driving a simple waive to recognize that it was appreciated the act of doing what you would hope somebody would do for you if the roles were reversed.
  • Posted on 02/12/2009 10:30 pm

humbledee

I remember when I was a kid my dad would stand up when a lady entered the room just out of respect. I grew up watching him hold the door open for people, or give someone a hand with something too heavy to lift, letting a woman with a young child or an elderly person cut in front of him in line. I would hope most people would do the same and if they don't thats ok because it's rewarding enough to know that we still can!
  • Posted on 02/12/2009 09:04 pm

martini

Heidi,
You would be surprised by the number of people who DON'T hold the door open. I had a woman do that and I almsot got hit with the door.
  • Posted on 02/12/2009 08:20 pm

wowzaa

Well, Jimmy, one should never stop dreaming. Maybe someday (after a tramatic head injury) she will. You never know......
  • Posted on 02/12/2009 07:10 pm

violanti

I agree with most of the ladies on this post - do not stop doing it! My husband did that type of thing for me when we first started dating and it was oh-so-romantic and now he doesn't and I would really appreciate that type of thing.
  • Posted on 02/12/2009 04:59 pm

jimmyteeten

(no wonder i can get her to date me . . . all this time i thought it was the 31 year age difference)

Jimmy
  • Posted on 02/12/2009 03:50 pm

feistyxsquirrel

I appreciate the gesture to a certain extent, but when the guy is not only opening doors for me, but also car doors or pulling out my chair...it gets a little overboard. I think this is more because I'm a bit more awkward in my female skin than most...if a guy playfully punches me on the arm and does a shot with me I'm more apt to think he's romantic. I tend to view romantic gestures as cheesy and forced. Maybe this is a result of growing up in a family of all women, who were ALL single- in addition to being incredibly cynical about men and relationships my whole life? I think it very well may be! Hahaha
  • Posted on 02/12/2009 02:27 pm

ginnjuice

I like it I think its a nice thing to do and don't stop doing it!!
  • Posted on 02/12/2009 02:19 pm

heidi

Don't most people always hold the door open for the person behind them? It's not often you see a door slammed on somebody's nose.
  • Posted on 02/12/2009 08:35 am

nikki

I like it, it's respectful.
  • Posted on 02/12/2009 07:14 am

jimmyteeten

Were you ready the March 1978 issue of Playboy immrb?

There was a time, soon after the sexual revolution of the 60's and early 70's and at the beginning of the women's liberation movement, that women said, "treat us as equals you no good, fat, ignorant slobs"!! So many things were taken to an extreme in that sentiment in order to break the status quo that had been in place for lifetimes.

Women felt compelled to exercise their sexuality on their terms, not a man's terms! They burned their bras . . . and they don't do that today! They went to work and today most women work by choice. They said, "do not treat me differently than you would a man", and today there is so much more equality between men and women . . . although there is still a ways for us to go.
  • Posted on 02/12/2009 01:03 am

jimmyteeten

So, during that "breakthrough" period, we were told to not hold a door for a woman because she was a woman! And just like the act of burning their bras went away, so did the need to not have a door held for them. Today, we should be holding doors for each other, no matter which gender, when ever it isn't too far out of our way and we should always be saying thank you. Simple common courtesy that has, unfortunately, become quite uncommon!

I really, really like the women of today! They are much more challenging than those of just a couple of generations ago! They're smarter, sexier and more satisfying partners in life than ever before. I'll conitue to hold the door everytime it fits but I'll always smile bigger when "she" says thank you!!

I will say that of all of the carbon based organisms in the world . . . . female homosapiens are, by far, my favorites!!

Jimmy
  • Posted on 02/12/2009 01:03 am

wowzaa

I've always held the door open for people. Especially women. I've always been polite and respectful of women. Opening doors, offering to help if I can see there having a hard time with something, and just being an all around nice guy. It's sort of the whole "pay it forward" thing. It only takes a second to be nice and help someone and you can make their day a little brighter.

As for chivalry being dead........some of us guys still hold honor, chivalry, and loyalty as the standard to live by. Case in point, I'm still very good friends with all the women I've ever dated, and have been told more than once how I treat women is how ALL men should treat women.

So I say don't stop being one of the "nice" guys. We have to pick up the slack for all the dolts out there that don't know how to properly treat a woman.
  • Posted on 02/12/2009 12:25 am

stretch

Hey mrb, Kudos to you! I also always get the door for the ladies. It is both polite and respectful. I find however that to many people in this world have become ignorant ie: I often hold the door for almost anyone if they r in range but find that most won't even extended themselves to say a simple "thanks" It's a sign of the times. People these days have no understanding of "common courtesy"
  • Posted on 02/11/2009 10:29 pm

martini

Hell no -DON'T stop! I like it when a man holds a door open the door for me and opens the car door. In return I open the guy's car door.

Here's another one for you: when you end the date (It is nice to have the date walk you to the door, but I think it is OK not to when it is very cold out or in a down pour) or you're out with friend's, make sure they get into their house BEFORE you drive off! That’s the right thing to do.
  • Posted on 02/11/2009 10:19 pm

smiley

Don't stop!!!!!! I like it when a guy holds the door for me, I think it's sweet. It's the little things that go a long way.
  • Posted on 02/11/2009 09:51 pm